I’m a week in to my #30DaysofBrave Challenge and what I have learned so far is that a major roadblock for me living a fearless life is centered around communication. The times that I have felt both challenged and empowered over the past few weeks have been the times where I have had intentional conversations about uncomfortable subjects.
I have recognized that a life of fearlessness is not achieved by avoiding conversations that are difficult but important. Being fearless means facing these challenging situations head on.
I have always tried to be conflict-averse; to not rock the boat, hurt feelings, or seem needy/immature/demanding/etc. (this stems from being a person who deals with anxiety). When someone does something or says something that hurts me, I tend to harbour it deep down inside instead of just saying, “Hey, let’s talk about how that thing you said/did made me feel.” This goes for all my relationships: with family, friends, employers, colleagues, teachers.
As part of the #30DaysofBrave Challenge, I have been pushing myself to start these important conversations that push the boundaries of my comfort zone. I have shared my opinion of what I believe my value and worth is (I prepped by watching Casey Brown’s TedTalk “Know your worth and then ask for it.”). I shared the 5 Languages of Love assessment with my partner to start the discussion of how we express and feel loved. I have had to fess up to feelings of stress, fear, and exhaustion so that I can get the support and reassurance that I need to move forward.
Opening up is hard. Sometimes, difficult experiences can lead you to live a life of fear, of suppressed emotions, and of complacency. The only thing that can break this cycle is choosing to be brave.
Look in the mirror today and tell yourself, “I deserve the life that I want.” Only when you believe that will you be able to cultivate the spirit inside you to get it. Know your worth. Teach people how you expect to be treated. Tell people when they hurt you. Have uncomfortable conversations. Ask for that raise. And above all else, don’t be afraid to love. Nobody else can do this life for you, so it’s your job to make it a good one. Because you do deserve it.
Be fearless, my darlings.